RELAX! Five Ways to Relax and Reduce Your Anxiety
Number One: Breathing

Most of you know by now that when you're anxious or panicked, you need to breathe, breathe, breathe! But, you may be breathing in a way that adds to your anxiousness, rather than calms you down.

The proper way to breathe when you're anxious is take in very slow breaths, all the way to the bottom of your stomach. Then, be sure to breathe out as well! Repeat this from 5 to 10 times. The breathing-in should feel gentle and comfortable, not hard and labored.

If you can, close your eyes, and mentally repeat a word to yourself, like, "relax," or "quiet and calm," or, "peace." Give yourself at least 60 seconds, or up to 5 minutes, to do this process.

As you breathe, let your shoulders go limp. Better yet, let your entire body go limp. All of this will add to your slow breathing and help your mind and body relax.

When you breathe and relax like this, you give your body a chance to release "endorphins," the body's natural tranquilizer. It calms your nerves and quiets your frantic mind. When you relax you can start to cope with yourself and your life much better!

Don't do this: breathe in big breaths of air to the middle of your chest. This kind of breathing will create hyperventilation, and you'll create more anxiety rather than reduce it. Make sure your breaths are long, slow, and down to your stomach. This will relax you.

Number Two: Meditation

I'm not talking about a spiritual or religious meditation (unless that's what you want to do!) I'm talking about doing a relaxing meditation.

Take about 10 minutes (15 minutes if you really want something longer) and find a quiet place to be alone. It could be in your garden, or bedroom, or living room, or even a park or the library. Turn off your phones.

Create a "mood" that signals relaxation: light a scented candle, use some aromatherapy, and put on some music that promotes rest.

(I highly recommend Steven Halpern's music, which is created specifically for soothing relaxation, stress reduction, healing and meditation. You can order his CDs at his website, www.innerpeacemusic.com.)

You can choose how you use your ten minutes of meditation. You can read an inspiring book that encourages you, such as a daily "thought-for-a-day" or another self-help book, maybe one about reducing anxiety.

Or, you can simply close your eyes, think the word "peace," and focus on the relaxing music you're playing in the background.

You can use the flame of the candle to gently stare at, and let your mind become empty and calm, like the smooth, glassy surface of a peaceful lake.

Give yourself a ten-minute vacation from all of life's daily demands. Just by taking ten minutes to slow down and empty your mind, your body will calm down, your breathing will relax, and your emotions will become quiet.

The peace and tranquility you create in your meditation will help you cope better with your life.

Number Three: Muscle Relaxation and Imagery

When you get fearful and panicked, you automatically tense the muscles of your body, which increases your fear and panic! You're usually not aware that you're doing this, but you are. And then it's harder to get yourself to relax when your muscles are tense.

You can relax all the muscles of your body and bring back calm and quiet. And, by adding pleasant mental imagery to the mix, you create even more serenity for yourself.

It's really very simple. After you practice this a few times, it will become much more automatic and easy to do.

You'll need about 10 minutes to do this exercise. Find a quiet place where you can lie down, or sit comfortably. Then, close your eyes so you focus inward.

Start with the top of your head, and mentally repeat: "I'm relaxing my head and face.
"I'm relaxing my neck and shoulders.
"I'm relaxing my arms and hands and fingers.
"I'm relaxing my chest and my back muscles.
"I'm relaxing my abdomen.
"I'm relaxing my hips.
"I'm relaxing my legs – my thighs and calves and ankles.
"I'm relaxing my feet – my heels, my arches and my toes.
"From the top of my head to the tips of my toes, I'm relaxing all the muscles of my body."

Let your breathing become slow and easy and gentle. You can remind yourself about how relaxed your breathing becomes when you're drifting off to sleep.

Now, add some pleasant, mental pictures to your relaxation. With your body now relaxed, imagine yourself at a favorite place out in nature. It could be a place you're very fond of, or it could be a place you've always wanted to visit.

Really develop your mental picture of your relaxing place in nature: the things you can touch, like sand at the beach, or soft, green grass in a meadow; the beautiful colors, like white, fluffy clouds in a blue sky, or earthy green colors in a forest; the soothing sounds, like birds singing, or water flowing in a creek; and even the fragrance, such as sweet wildflowers, or pungent pine needles.

It's okay if you can't mentally create pictures in your mind. Instead, sense, or feel, or simply tell yourself what kind of a beautiful, relaxing place you're imagining and you'll get the benefits.

Take some time to relax and enjoy the imagery you're creating in your mind. It will help your mind and your body to relax even more.

And, a reminder: you'll cope better with yourself and your life when you're more relaxed.

Number Four: Exercise

You don't have to turn this into a major project! Even a little bit of physical movement will help release pent-up nerves and relax your mind and body better.

Get out and move your body in a way that you enjoy. Maybe you'd like to go to the driving range and hit some balls. Perhaps you could do a lap of leisurely walking in your neighborhood.

Maybe some yoga stretches make you feel good. Or, put on some music and dance around the room for awhile.

Move your body in some type of exercise that feels good to you. Keep it simple and then you'll do it! You'll unwind and release the stress. When you release stress, you'll relax your mind as well and reduce your anxious thoughts and feelings.

Number Five: Sleep

If you're already getting a regular, good night's sleep, congratulations! It will help you manage stress and anxiety much better.

If you're not sleeping regularly, please pay attention. A regular, good night's sleep is essential for reducing and managing your anxiety.

Don't shortcut your sleep. You're setting yourself up for more, needless agitation and stress.

We need about eight hours of sleep every night in order to have good mental and physical health. If you're not getting this, please consider making it a priority to get into the habit of good, regular sleep each and every night.

You can encourage better sleep with good habits. Pick a regular time to go to sleep, and stick with it. As it gets close to your bedtime, stop the kind of activity that stimulates the brain. That might be getting off of the computer, or stop making phone calls.

Be sure you're not hungry; you may want to eat a little protein before bedtime. Make sure your bed is comfortable for you and the room temperature feels good.

Maybe sleep is difficult for you because you can't turn your mind off. You might be thinking about everything you've got to do the next day, or the rest of the week. If so, then take out a piece of paper and write down everything that you are thinking about. By putting it down on paper, your mind can then relax and let you sleep.

If you're ready to reduce your anxiety and feel relaxed and good about your life, please contact me for a free phone consultation. We can then decide how I may be able to help you with counseling or hypnotherapy .



Back to all articles