Don't "Should" on Yourself!
Do you "should" on yourself? If so, you'll increase your anxiety every time you "should" on yourself!

What does that mean, "should" on yourself? Let me give you an example: Mary puts in a long, busy week at work, and comes home Friday night, exhausted.

When she looks around at her home, she realizes she "should" clean house sometime over the weekend.

Saturday morning, she tells herself, "You should really get to the housecleaning." But she's still really tired. Afternoon rolls around, and she gets tougher: "You really should start cleaning house." But, really, she's very tired, and simply needs a rest.

Mary's anxiety increases with each hour that passes, and the house isn't cleaned. By Sunday evening, when the house still isn't cleaned, she's feeling extremely anxious.

What's Mary doing wrong? She's "shoulding" on herself, and it makes her anxiety shoot up.

Sometimes you "should" on yourself because you think it will motivate you to do something that needs to get done. But it rarely works! All it does is make you feel guilty and ashamed. And that increases your anxiety.

People "should" on themselves all the time! Like, "I should lose 10 pounds," or, "I should exercise more," or, "I shouldn't be so tongue-tied when I meet new people."

It may be very true that it would benefit you to accomplish what you think you "should." But, "shoulding" on yourself will simply make you anxious, and rarely will it make you accomplish your task.

Stop "shoulding" on yourself. It will only increase your anxiety. Instead, be loving and realistic about how and when to accomplish your goal.

Let's look at Mary's housecleaning problem again. How could she have solved it better, rather than "shoulding" on herself?

Maybe she could have waited until the next weekend, when she might have had more energy to clean house.

Or, maybe Mary could have completed small portions of her housework throughout the coming week. Perhaps, if she had the extra money, she could consider hiring a cleaning service once in a while!

You may be suffering already with too much anxiety. Don't add to it by "shoulding" on yourself. You'll only increase your anxiety. Stop, and reconsider some more loving options to accomplish your goals.

If you're ready to reduce your anxiety and feel relaxed and good about your life, please contact me for a free phone consultation. We can then decide how I may be able to help you with counseling or hypnotherapy .



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